MMXI the new beginning

this year's coming to its end. my god. time really flies. it feels like it was yesterday when we moved on from MMIX. so many things happened this year yet i can't list them down.

as usual, when the new year comes, i'll change my blog layout. just to give it a new color, new life, new hope. but honestly, i am still contemplating what theme shall i be using and what motto will it be as the header.

since i'm in the midst of designing my own wedding reception invitation card, i'm thinking of using the same theme as my new blog layout. to give it the honor to her and the whole wedding thingy. to encapsulate the whole memories of my big day in my humble scratch page. in conjunction with they say.

may MMXI be the most wonderful year ever. may it be the blast. i pray for the good things to happen in MMX. let us wave our hands and say goodbye to MMX and say hello MMXI, the new beginning.


p/s: the new theme is more or less like this. and it's still under construction. thus, stay tuned. love, me, iqhbal naeem.

checklist checked

i have so many things to be done. most of them are, DONE. in the likes of, barang hantaran, my baju melayu, nurfirdaus's long dress, her handbag, her shoes, her crabtree and evelyn stuffs, my golf oakley, etc. and to be honest, i didn't know getting married can be this stressful :)

but i always find a way to run things simultaneously, correctly even at the very last minutes. call me jack of all traits, master of none.

the problem is, with the three stooges i call us, me my sister and my mom, we do most of the things ourselves. we want to do it ourselves. and at some point, i was thinking of taking our wedding pictures myself until my mom reminded me that i'm supposed to be wedded, celebrated, NOT taking pictures :P we search for fabrics, all the way to singapore, we found the perfect lace and bought everything, for everybody but we skipped the satin and the chiffon. how irony was that? i designed my baju melayu, sampin and her dress myself. and not forgetting the tanjak.

the hall also, checked. booked. together with the master of ceremony. which i rather let it remain anonymous for a heat surprise. if only i can do the pelamin myself. but hey, i did engaged a wedding planner, but basically i gave her a big headache when i sketched those layouts myself. the hall decors, the fresh flowers arrangement, the bench selection. crazy.

we even went to nilai, three of us, who else other than me, my mom and my sister, in quest for doorgifts. but of course i leaved the tedious works to them. gluing ribbons and plastic flowers and arranging crystals for our hantaran, let's just say, i am too busy to get my hands dirty :P but i did had a say in everything. the color. the arrangement. everything.

the very big question is, is it normal for me to have my hands on all aspects? maybe. it depends. but i just want to say that i am all proud of myself, my mom and my beloved young sister for what we had pulled out together. the sweats, the fights in fabric shops, etc. man, you have no idea how ugly it was. got lost in singapore, when my phone blacked out, and we couldn't refer to GPS anymore to get back to malaysia, and only confusing foreign sign boards to guide us. how crazy was that? it was fun though, that's for sure.

but i know, in the end, this will be all over, and going to be just fine. i know, it's not perfect, nor it will be a perfect wedding. but i do know, that i've tried my best to make it happen, as perfect as i want it to be. it may not be perfect, but definitely it's worth it. and i love it.

p/s: the only two things left are, the invitation card and the nikah registration which is approximately 50% completed. taking things slow, as i prefer first things first.

memories last

i just watched the reader in one of the satellite television channels. i didn't know the movie was THAT good. it was simply, touchy sort of like two in one story. what a drama. i've always like drama movies. interview with vampire, count of monte cristo, the prestidge, etc. those are my favorites. but this drama really hit me deep.

the first story was about a cold boy fell in love with an older women probably twice his age. but the affair only lasted one summer. but she left a big impact on his life. he was in love, that's for sure. they make love and then he read her, story books. oh, she loved it. being read. he thought it was real. but then she left and she didn't say goodbye. he waited, but only to know that it was dead over.

few years later, he met her again, but this time not at her cozy small apartment secretly. this is where the second story started. this time he met her, no, not literally met her. technically, he saw her. but at a court trial. apparently, she's one of the defendants of jewish genocidal war criminal. she was in a jewish camp before she met him which eventually become a professional law practitioner. she was a SS soldier. she admitted that she committed those crimes, just to stay in her denial state of mind. that she is an illiterate. not be able to read and write.

but the story is not about her sentence to be imprisoned for lifetime. it is how she learned how to read during her sentence. he kept sending her tapes. tapes of those stories he used to read her years before. long long time ago. he's probably in his 40's, divorced, always lonely and cold as always. and she utilized those tapes to learn to read, and write.

all in all it was a good movie. heartbreaking. and david kross, the young boy and kate winslet were superb in their acting.

but ego pays. a lot. and ego kills. at the end of the movie, she killed herself. probably by the same reason why she was imprisoned for lifetime, her ego.

but, the memories last. they lasted for his entire life. he couldn't forget her. the details. every. single. detailed details. how he met her for the first time. how he used to read her books. even after she's gone.

same goes to me. i might not be the same lawyer who was pervert enough to have an affair with someone older but i do, have my own set of stories. stories which i rather call them the quiet things that no one ever know.

i might looked okay, but deep down inside, there are some things, embedded. they stay. intact. like the reader.

yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah yeah. oh yeah. i think it's been a while since i wrote here. nothing much. hectic with daily routines and the preparation details.

but hey, chris brown just released his new single entitled yeah three times. i think the video was cool. brown at his best again. at least. tantalizing beat and cool video. after all those rihanna black eyed thingy, right? his moves, the quick feet dance, simply terrific. it reminds me of forever and with you's video :)

here's the video link. enjoy it though~

time is running fast, the clock is ticking superfluous. so many things to do. but deep down inside i know, these all are worth it, and everything is going to be just, just just, fine. finger crossed~

finally finally

finally. finally. and finally. i'm engaged. my intention to marry her was pure and truthful. that i almost drop tears when her father said he accepted my uncle's engagement proposal on behalf of me and my family.

finally my sincerity is accepted sincerely by the receiving end. sincere and honest enough to accept me for who i am and for who i've been. and for who i am going to be and always be. honesty is no longer the hardest thing for me. now it's all about me and honesty.

finally finally i got what i always want which is sincerity. finally finally she's all my true and truthful authenticity. and finally finally i am almost complete, completely.

i am all happy. everybody is happy. all cheery for the soon to be, finale, finally finally :) then i can hold my chin high that i live my life truthful, and hopefully successfully. they rhymed, yeah! :P

old cottage

i'm back at my hometown, Kuantan. for this year's eid-ul adha. there's always something refreshing about this house. the house where i grew up. and there will be always something to ponder, to refresh and freshen up about when i come back to this house.

this is the house where i used to feel everything was so big. but now everything in this house is small. and looks cute and simple. like how three of us, me, my brother and my little sister used to be. and it's always nice to look back at our toys, our old bedroom, the bed sheets, my room in the attic, my old lego collections, my sister's cute old Garfield knitting, our old pictures and frames, our old text books, our old t-shirt collections. all the things are still there, untouched. man, it is good to be back. it's almost a year past since last time i was in this house.

it's not that i don't want to go back, as my mom always keep pressing me to drive her back during weekends. but work commitments, golf, and other stuff prohibited me to do so. but it doesn't necessarily mean i don't miss my origin.

well, sometimes, it's good to rewind back where we come from. to remind back how far have we come so far. the stretch. so far yet so close. i might have bought another house in the city but my heart still beats this house. so close and dearly. this is where it all started for me and the whole family, 5 of us.

i miss my childhood. this cottage speaks the whole volume, the whole spectrum of memoirs of my childhood, and my journey. sigh~

remember november

it's almost half past november. so fast. feels like the year is just started. like it was still in march or april. man. time really flies. so fast in a blink of an eye, you won't notice that people around you change, a lot. and worse, you won't be able to realize how much you have changed over the months.

speaking of november, at this point last year, i was still in Sarawak. staying up late. usually. that time, i just picked up golf, about to buy myself a set. look at me now. back home in the capital, and golf is almost everything now :)

last year november was one of the toughest months, difficult period of time, in my life. i learned a lot this month last year.

this year, it's all a different story now. i am getting engaged two weeks from now. who ever thought of that huh? :P

nothing much to point out in this post. i just want to share how much i've changed as an employee and as a person, as a whole. and i am much happier. stable. chilled :) yeah, it's good to be back. i mean it. it's GOOD. till then, i'll catch up with you later, with more updates on the engagement. OMG! i'm getting married!! :P