Tuesday, 28 May 2013

An Eternal Student

I went to my old office in the twin towers yesterday. It was a good reminiscence of the good old days. It is always good to see old friends and bosses at old work place. Now I'm serving my old colleagues to supply their shortage in case there's any in the hydrocarbon finished products.

I left my previous job earlier this month to join the current one. I'm doing petroleum trading now. It was a tough decision to make, probably one of the hardest one, if there's such one. I really like what I was doing in the previous company. I like the culture, the job descriptions given, I love the liberty of control given, I was free to roam, the trust to make decisions in both commercial deals and market developments. It was fun yet full of life learning. It was the first time I'm doing sales and marketing. I took the giant leap of faith to do something I never done before, something alien to me, some tasks I never trained before, not by design or in formal educational background. But I took the challenge, to leave my comfort zones, believe in my capability and natural talents, which is, being with people.

But love affair don't last. As I was getting good in what I did, learning fast, came offers knocking on my door.   I got two offers. One to be a downstream operational consultant and another one to be a petroleum trader. Both were handsome offers. Double from what I was getting.  So there was I, in dilemma. Between my passion and my responsibility to my loved ones. My soon to be born son is due in July. So this has to be his, meant for my boy. My heir to my throne :) My family deserves a better life. Not to say that what we are having now is bad, but certainly an improved life and house earning will help. Well, money is not everything towards good life balance and happiness but money plays a big role in everything in life nowadays.

It took me sometime to come out with the decision. But good offers usually don't come knocking twice. It was sad to part ways with things that you like to do, especially when you were just about to get started to get better in it. I learned a lot. Tonnes of knowledge gathered. Finally I found something I like. After almost 7 years of professional career in the industry, after years of disappointments and "try and error" downfalls, I found it, the one dream job. And it is safe to say, I was happy, finally. But as we grow older there will come to a point where we have to make a decision against our own willing and put our loved ones first. I've reached to that point where I become less selfish and think more others under my care. Well, that's life.

Here I am now at G Tower, one of the famous stylish office and hotel building occupied by mostly oil and gas companies in the middle of the city. Starting all over again. Learning and learn and learn. I never seem to stop learning. For me, the learning process has no end. The curve is always going to be left open. And I feel like I am an eternal student in this life. I am still yet to seal my very first trade deal. Looking forward to that. I kind of like the culture here. Similar to what I had before but slightly different in some ways. The bosses are nice and ambitious. It is a new company with big aspirations. And I'm going to be a vital part in growing this company to be big. Hopefully.

This morning, as I was in the train to the office, scrolling down through my old music playlists, I stumbled to this song which I first listened 7 years ago. I downloaded it when I about to graduate from the university and I listened to it everyday during my days in the factory. The first job. Time really flies. Seems like it was forever. I've changed so much since then. Physically. I'm fat now. LOL.

So I want to share this song. It's a good song by a band called Nevertheless. About love and lover. It is saying that life must be spent like we are living and dying. Let us live like we are alive, nevertheless we are  dying, soon. Deep :P

Being an emo band star is probably the only thing remains unfulfilled yet. I've been an engineer, an executive, been in aviation operations, did governance for a while, hated it and left for sales, still a graphic artist, in love with photography, then an avid golfer and now trading. But never been a star. Not just quite be able to continue with the band thingy when we left the university.

 I now define myself as a seasoned aviator turned trader. Was a lousy engineer, a retired lover and now venture as a father and trader. But my love to my family will never cease. Enjoy the song and till then, I'm out.

Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Effortless In Forgiveness

I just don't understand why people still wants to justify when they are saying sorry.

We don't justify why we are sorry. Guilt is never to be reasoned. Forgiveness is a product of common civic value, a by product of humility. Apologies are never to be followed by proud excuses.

We are humans, we are bound to make mistakes. Error prone. When we do make mistakes, we feel sorry about them, and the guilt creeps in. And we seek for forgiveness. That is part of humanity and that is all about being a mortal. We have feelings.

We don't say "I'm so sorry for what I've done, but really, I want you to know that I did it because of I don't respect you bla bla bla.."...

Seriously, that was horrible. I doubt the sincerity of the plead for forgiveness.

And when people tries to do that, that derivation of why they are sorry, they tend to talk a lot. Tonnes of unnecessary things. Too much of a thing really will not help to ease up things.

Too much info doesn't mend, it is deteriorating instead. Bores the patch, pokes the wound.

We say sorry. Full stop. That's it. That is how it should be. And somehow it reflects true honesty.

And for that, sorry is always seems to be the hardest word. Because it is not easy. Only the strong can say sorry. Sincerely.

But it is never meant to be so expensive, let alone being cheap. Forgiveness is just priceless. And for me, it should be effortless.

Monday, 18 February 2013

Marketeer : A New Found Glory

It’s been more than a month and a half. I finally got to do sales and marketing. Well guys, stick around and see what I have to say about finally being a marketeer.

From what I've gathered after 7 years in the oil and gas industry, my observations tell me that it’s a task of being perseverance, margins play-around, with the risk being rejected, or easily accepted, like gambling using soft skills, persistent follow up, getting to know people, accommodating different people with different needs, customisation in solutions, timely delivery, bla bla bla. Long list ahead.

I've learned some of those along the way, some I've come across by many means, and some I might not be truly familiar with, but basically I got the whole idea. Well, me being me, with my greatest assets of persuading and being able to see the big pictures, I had my head over my heels when I got the job offer. I knew that I can do it. Like a child riding his very first bicycle, hell I was full of joy. For some reasons, I was very confident and keen on this new adventure of mine, embarking on this thrilling journey of a game called sales! But then again, my over positivity caught me off guard.

Apparently, there's more to it. A lot of things that I didn't know back then. Now we talk bout cold calls, price validity, due diligence, market intelligence, intimacy visits or lunches, and the hardest part is, expanding the market. Sustaining existing customers is essential, don't get me wrong on that, but getting complacent with the current market is just never enough if we want to survive in this rough business. In order to maintain the competitiveness, both in terms of pricing and product availability, there's a lot to consider.

I think I've outdone myself well, for my first month. I've sold 7 units of tote tanks, with more than 150 thousands revenue. Which quite an achievement for a rookie salesman. But I will never rest and take the foot off the gas. It was considered a given sale, from a reoccurring client. I was there at the place at the right time. I need to out stretch myself more. Against the complacency which honestly started to creep in as soon as I got my first two purchase orders.

Nevertheless, what I like most bout doing sales is, meeting people. Oh, how much I thrive it. I'm surprised that I talked bout the product average of less than 5 minutes in the entire meeting. The rest is all about everything. Global. Borderless. We talked about diabetes, football, parenthood, politics and current political scenes, the jews, world economic, travelling, people and places to see, we talk bout dreams, marriage, photography and even golf! Golf topic can be long and very draggy. :) And I like that. Being able to talk about almost everything. It might not be in depth. But suffice enough to keep the interest intact, hence an enquiry for a purchase. And I learned a lot from my clientèle and the people I met everyday. Seems like there's always something new everyday. Something that you never knew you going to get to know. Bloody tongue twisting :P 

Moving on. Anyway, what I love most is, instilling values in people's life, in their daily routine. Which what I do best. Inculcating positive energies for people I met and people around me. Offering solutions to fit their needs, both in terms of professionally and in personal development. Some of the things I do, or I say, might look trivial and irrelevant. But I do and say those in a platform of pure honesty and well being. And I hope this valour and noble traits of mine will continue and never meet their end. For further seems forever.

Life is good so far. I get to travel. A lot. Somehow golf becomes part of the job. My job description is very much in lined with my natural talents. All in all, I am happy, or should I say, much happier now. I'm thrilled to go to work everyday. I go to work early, without any hassle. I never drag myself to work nowadays. Anticipating new challenges everyday. It couldn't be any "perfecter" than this. Yeah, I know, I just made that word up. Lol! :P

In conclusion, this new found glory of mine is overwhelming. I'm all excited. I feel rejuvenated. Feels like I'm alive and young again. I feel relevant in everything I do. For some reasons, I feel like age will never catch me. I am just not going to get old. I level up instead. The excitement kicks start my heart, and it beats again. Breathing youth values deep from my core pinching straight to people's heart. I'm not just a trend setter, I am all a life changer.

Friday, 4 January 2013


I know, it's kind of belated already to talk about resolutions. It's already four days past the new year's eve. But when it comes to self reflections and realizations, there's never a chance to be too late and it's better late than never. Being fashionably late somehow becoming my repertoire lately :)

Well, what can I say bout new year's resolutions. It has becoming a repetitive notion, more like a cycle, endless, and boring too. For me, listing it out alone is never enough. But achieving it all is the key. It's tough. Life is tough. And too short to make it all easy for us. And for that reason, I prefer the list to be a short as possible, concise and most importantly, achievable. Let's be realistic here.

I'm pushing for thirties this year. I'm no longer in my twenties. I found it hard to find a suitable and subtle way  to say goodbyes to my mid and late twenties and a proper warm hello for my thirties. But it is all dust and done. Time flies. Like really fast. And those 10 years of late were, etching I should say. They shaped my well being, my personality, matured me up, heartbroken, joys, disappointments, achievements, etc, you name it all. But that's life, and life's like that. We can't run from all those things. I've seen the best, the worst, I wouldn't change what I've been through, I've touched the sky, I wormed myself up to leap the ground, I've fell on the floor, fell hard, hit the wall, but I did what I had to do.

Life is full of obstacles or the way I see it now, in a very positive perspective, they are challenges. Obstacle sounds too negative and too much for me. Well, I've been a fool, people called me freak, a geek, and nerd too. I've been loved, and I've been lied to. It's all like a cycle. There were ups and down. Balance. But all in all, I rather try and fail, thousand times denied. At least I know, whenever the pain felt, I'm alive. I've been right, certainly been wrong countless of times, but in the end it all worked out. The scars, are scratches of memories. They tell tales. And never healed. But time, they condone. So I can appear to be moved on. On the contrary, deep inside, I carry them all as part and parcel of my learning curve. Still do.

So what's my resolutions then? Simple, I want to get organized. And stay focused. These things don't seem to be in my list of fortes. I seem to be so incapable to stay focused. So now I want to be early. To work, for pray, family, golf, parenthood, Everything. On time for everything, in everything. Basically I want to be timely. To perfection. For me, life, it's all bout timing. And I want to be in control. On top of things. Because time is the only thing we can not buy. So priceless, that we can never turn it back. There's no rewind in life. No such thing as replay in this short span of living. I want to make it a habit. Control. I repeat, be in control.

Hence the name of the new blog layout. Breaking the habits. Since it's the second time I've chose the name, I put the 2.0 there. Just to make a difference from the previous one. I believe being timely and on time can make a huge difference and impact in my life. Hopefully it will, and I will gain control. People said, to gain control, first we have to submit. In my case, I've submitted to much, too much procrastination. I've suffered enough because of being less punctual. So now, in conjunction with me being old (lol!), I seriously don't want to be in the slavery of slackingness. I'm not doing this just for myself, but I am improving for the best for everyone, especially both in below's picture :)