Tuesday, 28 May 2013

An Eternal Student

I went to my old office in the twin towers yesterday. It was a good reminiscence of the good old days. It is always good to see old friends and bosses at old work place. Now I'm serving my old colleagues to supply their shortage in case there's any in the hydrocarbon finished products.

I left my previous job earlier this month to join the current one. I'm doing petroleum trading now. It was a tough decision to make, probably one of the hardest one, if there's such one. I really like what I was doing in the previous company. I like the culture, the job descriptions given, I love the liberty of control given, I was free to roam, the trust to make decisions in both commercial deals and market developments. It was fun yet full of life learning. It was the first time I'm doing sales and marketing. I took the giant leap of faith to do something I never done before, something alien to me, some tasks I never trained before, not by design or in formal educational background. But I took the challenge, to leave my comfort zones, believe in my capability and natural talents, which is, being with people.

But love affair don't last. As I was getting good in what I did, learning fast, came offers knocking on my door.   I got two offers. One to be a downstream operational consultant and another one to be a petroleum trader. Both were handsome offers. Double from what I was getting.  So there was I, in dilemma. Between my passion and my responsibility to my loved ones. My soon to be born son is due in July. So this has to be his, meant for my boy. My heir to my throne :) My family deserves a better life. Not to say that what we are having now is bad, but certainly an improved life and house earning will help. Well, money is not everything towards good life balance and happiness but money plays a big role in everything in life nowadays.

It took me sometime to come out with the decision. But good offers usually don't come knocking twice. It was sad to part ways with things that you like to do, especially when you were just about to get started to get better in it. I learned a lot. Tonnes of knowledge gathered. Finally I found something I like. After almost 7 years of professional career in the industry, after years of disappointments and "try and error" downfalls, I found it, the one dream job. And it is safe to say, I was happy, finally. But as we grow older there will come to a point where we have to make a decision against our own willing and put our loved ones first. I've reached to that point where I become less selfish and think more others under my care. Well, that's life.

Here I am now at G Tower, one of the famous stylish office and hotel building occupied by mostly oil and gas companies in the middle of the city. Starting all over again. Learning and learn and learn. I never seem to stop learning. For me, the learning process has no end. The curve is always going to be left open. And I feel like I am an eternal student in this life. I am still yet to seal my very first trade deal. Looking forward to that. I kind of like the culture here. Similar to what I had before but slightly different in some ways. The bosses are nice and ambitious. It is a new company with big aspirations. And I'm going to be a vital part in growing this company to be big. Hopefully.

This morning, as I was in the train to the office, scrolling down through my old music playlists, I stumbled to this song which I first listened 7 years ago. I downloaded it when I about to graduate from the university and I listened to it everyday during my days in the factory. The first job. Time really flies. Seems like it was forever. I've changed so much since then. Physically. I'm fat now. LOL.

So I want to share this song. It's a good song by a band called Nevertheless. About love and lover. It is saying that life must be spent like we are living and dying. Let us live like we are alive, nevertheless we are  dying, soon. Deep :P

Being an emo band star is probably the only thing remains unfulfilled yet. I've been an engineer, an executive, been in aviation operations, did governance for a while, hated it and left for sales, still a graphic artist, in love with photography, then an avid golfer and now trading. But never been a star. Not just quite be able to continue with the band thingy when we left the university.

 I now define myself as a seasoned aviator turned trader. Was a lousy engineer, a retired lover and now venture as a father and trader. But my love to my family will never cease. Enjoy the song and till then, I'm out.