wishful thinking

i was just wondering. sitting alone in my office's room in the middle of the night. taking a break from graphs and charts and data. ya, it's kind of spooky knowing that i am all alone on the whole floor. my operators are downstairs. i think. assuming one or two of them are watching astro in the crew room. or, they might even not in the premise. standing by at the apron waiting for transmile cargo aircraft to be refueled.

i am trying to conduct two studies. one, to convince the management that i need a bigger storage tank for my aviation gasoline or also better known as avgas. two, to convince the management that i need optimum 3 persons per shift for my 24 hours operation. that's the reason why am i still in the office this late.

when i'm all alone, it usually gets to me, to think. of many things. so i was wondering what it is like if i have a family now. a wife, cooked the dinner, waiting at the dining table for me to return so that we can have dinner together. sigh, wishful thinking. and again, reality check kills the dream, taking the breath of me. exhaled. frustrated. no surprise there.

what would it takes to make you come back? the dream. the thoughts. of having someone. but i keep telling myself what it is, the truth, and it's just ain't like that. and i'm just getting boring and boring. even my mom told me that i look gloomy nowadays.

ya, right.