flying without wings

nope, uh uh, euww, not the song. i used to complain how exhausted i was back then when i was in sarawak. i used to travel a lot. i flew almost everyday. i stayed in the hotel most of the time. remember when i addressed on how fast my life turned out to be?

now? not anymore. i just realized that it's been a month plus of me free from flying. no more early morning flights. traveling back and forth. i kind of miss those. irony. at one point you hate it so much and all of sudden now you craving for it back. life. is like that. full of surprises. challenges. life is a hunt. like a wheel. one time you are on top, at the peak, at the tangent, at your very best, and the next thing you know you could be drowned, drunk, flat below, at your very worst.

now i'm still a frequent flier. it's just that it is now wingless. not in few thousands feet up in the air. but i fly in my own world. full of creativity. i'm free. carefree. like a bird. but no beak or beakless. hahaha.

i have my kenny and my jenny. jenny is the car. but it's a boy despite the girlish looks. hehe. you remember kenny? the camera. it's a she. despite the bold black built, complete with her new BFF, miss flashy, the speedlite external flash gun. now they are with me most of the time. i'm back at my best. on form. artworks, posters, printings, pictures editing, you name it. yet still i'm longing to name my golf set. too many of them to name them all. ranging from the shortest iron to the longest driver. maybe i should have named them like, "irony" for the irons, and "drivey" for the drivers. hahaha. what's with the shallow naming scheme? so against my nature and so much the creativity, huh? lol~

now let's talk serious things with seriousness, shall we?

do you know that eagles will go through an crucial, decisive, ultimate change and a very painful transformation process in their life cycle? all eagles will have their peak of their life at the age of 40 when they are matured enough, they have strong talons and beak to hunt. they have big wings span, to soar very high in the sky and can dip through in certain level of water surface to catch fishes and they are well equipped with thick feathers to float and to protect them from mountain colds. one thing you should one know that the eagle has the longest lifespan of its species and can live up to 70 years.

but in order to live up to 70 years, an eagle has to make a hard decision. this has to be well supported with the ability to see what's beyond our senses, our eye sights. clairvoyance. we have to be far sighted and firm with the choices that we make.

apparently, when in their 40's, the sharp and flexible talons become less capable of grabbing prey in flight. the previously sharp and long beak becomes bent. the feathers needed so desperately for soaring become old-aged and stuck to the chest, making it difficult to fly like the eagles used to. life, somehow is not as nice as it used to be to the eagles. then, it appears that the eagles are left with only two options: whether to die or go through a painful process of change. the transformation process lasts 150 days. the eagles choose to change by going high up on the mountain to their nest.

then, the eagles pluck out the beak by knocking it against a rock until it's out. after that, the eagles waited for their new beak to grow back.

next, the eagles pluck out their talons and wait again till the new ones grow back.

afterward, the eagles pluck out its old-aged feathers and lets new ones grow while waiting. when the 5 months process of painful transformation is completed, the eagles are now rebirth or rejuvenated and ready to soar and fit for action again.

why is change is needed? why is it so necessary for us to move on? why the eagles are so keen with the extreme transformation which doesn't guarantee their survival in the first place? yet or maybe hence, they believe it is best for their survival.

people say that a lot of times, in order to survive, we have to start a process of personal change no matter how painful, no matter how long, no matter what, we just have to do it to breathe "life" back into our years. just like what i'm doing now. for the past one year plus. changing my paradigms, getting rid of old, enslaving memories, stale habits and obsolete thoughts to allow us to unload past burdens. which, i believe a worthy transformation. insha'Allah.

well, there goes my flying without wings theory. sometimes, doing nothing or doing less does not necessarily mean that you are not doing anything. it is just that you are doing something more meaningful. it's the quality, not the quantity. ya, ya, same old same old. :) whatever it is coming, i will continue to ride cool free, and smile upon like a bee. heck.. i'm so sleepy. zzzzz!